BickerySebastian's game Reviews on Newgrounds

[Ongezellig - Het VOC Spel!]

This barely has anything related to Ongezellig aside from the fact that the pilot is mainly a girl who HAS to make a history project on a stricter deadline. I don't get why Mymy is the girl you see when you get a Game Over once the British or any other ship catches you, especially when Mymy is obsessive with Dutch culture in general and that SHOULD make her the one calling the shots on the Dutch boats.
Gameplay aside, it really has nothing to do with the show at all. It's more or less based on the Indian spice trades, except it's really boring because instead of crossing through the oceans to return back to the Netherlands to sell those spices back, whilst risking your lives due to pirates also wanting that spice, it's just your boat ONLY around India and either spices or gold will spawn eventually within the map. There ARE power ups for the game, sure, but the only reason why you want to get more gold to switch from Maya to Kiki or any of the other characters is because they're faster the more expensive they get. What's worse is that the AI is very braindead and will get stuck on land, so if you play them right, you practically have no difficulty in getting those spices or gold.
In general, it's a very boring execution of the Indian spice trades with barely any strategy you can use in this game.

[Trumpy Kong]

This game made me want to vote for Trump.
Because well, it's short but problem is I just don't like the presentation, just looks out of place for a game that's just Donkey Kong but you replace most of the graphics for left-wing political comics. And not the good kind.

TrumpyKong responds:

Oh but you're wrong.
I replaced ALL of the graphics with bad left-wing political comics.

[Worst Game in Existance]

I mean, this isn't exactly terrible because well, the gameplay is so simple that it's like trying to fail at cooking hot milk, you just pretty much boil milk. And it does what it's supposed to, so there's no real reason to fix what wasn't broken. While graphics aren't that appealing, it's annoying that for people who's trying to make something as their first time that they'll go ridiculously pessimistic on it. I get it, it's your first game, but be at least PROUD that you made it this far enough to finish making a game. It's baby steps for sure, it's not the BEST but at the end of the day, you just don't strike gold by either the first or last game, it's something that you gotta learn to develop whether you have the "talent" or not.

Diruiz responds:

I greately appreciate the praise but, I'm saying this game is bad because I made a timer and did it in 20 minutes, It's actually quite surprising that I could make such a good game as my 2nd attempt at coding in a 20 minute time constraint. So I'm not truly being pessimistic, as I'm kind of proud of myself, I basically named this "Worst game in excistance" because of a lack of naming ideas.

[Idle Run Aya]

It's an idle game for sure...
With little instructions on how it works. I get that it's an idle game, but it honestly doesn't feel like I'm progressing much at all and this is because of how progress works in this game. You see, there are steps and there are levels, but there's no way of understand how leveling up works in the game and sometimes Aya can switch from a more casual walk to a bit of a jogging run, but it makes no sense that a casual walk is faster than a jogging run. Sometimes Aya will just stop out of nowhere and there's no way to know that she'll do this aside from letting it happen.

Jitsukoan responds:

Hi! Thx for playing and your feedback.
The progress is to slow, i will change this in the next build:
-She should run longer with one click

-fruit buffs: [longer running] [faster running] [step multiplicator]

-filling the free spaces between the Unlocks with new cool stuff so she becomes something on all new levels!

-Level should effect more here stamina so she runs longer with one click

I will add a small "stamina" bar in the under part oft the screen. So the Player can see how long she runs.

She alwas beginns and ends the run with a walking Animation. The speed are not changing in this stat, don't know why you think she goes fast? But i notet it for testing.

Maybe a explainantion picture for the Level Up System would be a good idea. The question comes often.

The Level Up Unlocks are not finished. Only 40% of it are filled. There will be more unlocks in future Updates.

[Jumper]

It gets this score because while it's an easy game, this game can be sometimes punishing to the player out of nowhere and forces you to restart the WHOLE game because in some stages, if you pick the wrong path, there's NO way to go back to a previous level to go to the correct path, meaning that either you die on purpose OR have to click on Menu and then click Play to realize that this game has no "save" nor checkpoint system to send you back to where the game allows you to go back.
One problem is controls, while it's not so bad itself, they're good as is, the problem starts where a level requires you to jump over a spike but not too high to hit a spike above you. In any other game, pressing the jump button lightly gives you a shorter jump, but holding it longer gives you longer, full jump. In this game, every press on Jump is always a full jump, so you have to awkwardly jump then move instead of using short jumps in a good pace. What doesn't work is any platforming with slopes, because it gives you inconsistent jumps, so you might either jump backwards or jump in a straight line, which you'll have to correct yourself whilst airborne. In some stages, this is annoying because it's the game fucking you over rather than your bad skills be the cause of it.

[W-Clicker: A parody of today's gaming industry]

This game has no satire. Who the fuck made this, the writers of Chip 'n Dale: Rescue Rangers (2022)?
There should be a law when it comes to satire, if you're saying that "triple AAA games are boring and unfinished" then don't fucking do what makes them bad. And even then, the game doesn't "mocks the lazy and greedy practices of the big game companies," it becomes what it claims to make fun of the first place. Bad design hardly is excused if the product's dogshit without any positive qualities to it. The only thing it "satirizes" is lazy pseudo-intellectual game developers.

[Cat fly challenge]

I mean, it's just flying up and down. It's coding isn't so much a problem, but it just honestly feels unfinished given how there's barely anything visually impressive aside from the ship itself. Also no audio? Really? Not for the engine, you crashing, or even completing the game?

Th4tUsernamesTaken responds:

Ok furry, suck a ball.

[NG BBS Awards 2023]

Blastoise is still getting the Worst Poster award in my heart, but oh well, good stuff.
Also there's a bug where flipping the next page in the B book causes it to change to the Award book, then comes back to the load frame but your mouse is missing (I mean, it's there, just not with any graphic it's there, so you have to just hover something to know where it is.).

[The Game that Attempts to Compensate for Poor Game Deisgn with An E-]

You just do shit...
Nothing much and that's what it deserves, 0 stars for not even doing fucking ANYTHING. A game that tries won't get this rating because it knows that something is better than nothing, this doesn't.

PersistentDreamer responds:

To my fellow game designer:

You're right! I do just "do shit". (At least the games I've put out here) However, that also applies to literally everyone. In fact, I'd go so far as to say that the idea that we should be doing something else, something grander, something more ambitious, that that idea threatens to take away all the joy from creating.

I'd warrant that some of the most masterful pieces of art, some of the greatest works of literature, of history, came about because some guy acted like he was hot shit, when he clearly wasn't, but didn't care, did his own thing, and published it. This very website got its start with Tom Fulp making Flash games about clubbing seals and pimping out the Teletubbies.

Salvador Dali made a phone lobster. What's his face painted a bunch of soup cans. And Herman Melville died believing himself to be a failure after spending a year and a half of his life writing Moby Dick. Tesla made countless inventions, but most of his inventions were stolen by Edison and he died poor.

I suppose what I'm trying to say is, there's nothing wrong with just doing shit, and there's no guarantee that just because you're doing something bigger the world will care. The world is stupidly random like that sometimes. That's not to say I don't have my own serious project, because I do. I have a game I've been working on for over a year now. But sometimes you want to just put down the fancy stuff and bust out the crayons, let things flow a little bit, you know what I'm saying?

And hell, if Dali and Soup Picture Guy got famous for that shit, why not throw out my work? One final thing I want to clarify: You stated I didn't try. That's not true. I tried to fail. There's a world of difference between those two things. Not trying is pointless. Trying to fail has a certain...educational value. As a fellow game dev, I suggest you try it sometime. Who knows? Maybe some cool idea, mechanic, or way of looking at your bigger projects will pop up as a result. I know it has with mine.

Take it easy.

[Dominik Kills Himself]

A much shitty version of Nene Interactive Suicide. There's really only 5 ways to die, considering that chubby bunny is just swallowing pills and I'm not going to wait for like 50 minutes just so I can see poorly drawn cat die from an overdose. They're all unimpressive considering that, 1, most of these aren't even remotely graphic, like for example, hanging, bleach, bong water, or chainsmoking, and 2, even a suicide by gun is that unimpressive, because it's just a shitty corpse with a pool of blood. Not even the walls get tainted by the goddamn blood, and 3, there's no sound when you do it. There's the music, but that's what you're getting for this dogshit game.